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Illuminaughty

IlluminaughtyIlluminaughtyIlluminaughty
entry page
Menu
  • home
  • IllumiNaughty Induction
  • team naughti
  • NAUGHTYCOIN
  • tokenomics
  • Classified documents
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  • naughty updates
  • Secret Rituals
  • cereal box prophecies
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    • Secret Rituals
    • cereal box prophecies
    • Testamonials
    • Join the Inner Circle

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About Illuminaughty

IllumiNaughty Induction Ritual v3.1 (Beta)

  

Welcome, Initiate.

You’ve stumbled upon usβ€”not by chance, but by chaotic cosmic alignment.

You’ve decoded the sandwich wrapper, followed the glitter trail, and passed the Goat Test (don’t worry, it was subconscious). And now, here you are.

You are about to join the world’s least-coordinated, most gloriously misguided secret society.

Not the Illuminatiβ€”we don’t do suits and lizard people.

We are the IllumiNaughty: the glitter-cloaked, meme-fueled, PowerPoint-wielding architects of a barely functional global takeover.

We were exiled from volcano lairs, canceled in Canada, and once declared an international toaster threat.

But we endureβ€”powered by mischief, microwave burritos, and a deep belief in weaponized absurdity.


By joining us, you accept the following truths:


The moon landing was real, but the moon is fake.


Chaos is a valid leadership style.


If in doubt, blame the goat.


All rituals must be performed in interpretive dance unless otherwise approved by the cabal.


You now have access to INTβ€”the IllumiNaughty Token.

Use it wisely. Use it recklessly. Use it to unlock bonus conspiracies, glitter bombs, and full access to the Forbidden Spreadsheet.


Now raise your right hand and repeat after me:


β€œI solemnly swear to be weird, wobbly, and wildly disobedient.”

β€œI pledge allegiance to the chaotic unknown.”

β€œAnd I shall never, ever reveal the secret recipe for the Illuminachos.”


Welcome to the inner circle.


Initiation complete.


Now go forth, and confuse with purpose.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

WHERE SECRETS SPARKLE, SATIRE REIGNS, AND MISCHIEF IS ALWAYS WELL-DRESSED.

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Illuminaughty

πŸ“ Illuminaughty Headquarters 🌎 Public Front (Misdirection HQ) Million Life Melbourne Central, Coop's Shot Tower, Melbourne VIC 3004 (Enter through the claw machine marked "OUT OF ORDER") πŸ•―οΈ Secret Command Post (Actual HQ) Rhonda’s Basement Exact address redacted due to high levels of mystical printer activity. (Somewhere between a box of tarot cards and a sentient humidifier.) πŸ›°οΈ Digital HQ (Proxy Node) Gary’s Toaster Last seen glitching in an Oslo smart kitchen. Whispers in binary. Screams in burnt sourdough. 🐐 Field Office (Occasionally Mobile) Inside a Goat-Shaped Constellation Visible only to those who believe. Best viewed during Retrograde. Bring glitter.

illuminaughty@gmail.com

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